Something to Think About


So I mentioned before my anorexia has stepped up her game. And she’s ripping me apart from the inside out but that’s nothing new. It just makes it hard for me to achieve my goals and dreams.

For instance I want to dance in Ha: The Breath of Life night show at the Polynesian Cultural Center. But here is the thing, as a palagi if you want to do night show, you need to now Maori, Tahitian, and Hawaiian dance because that is just about all they will let you do for the sake of authenticity. I can pass as afakase- or hapahaole. That means half Polynesian basically. With a nice tan and my dark hair and dark eyes yeah, it’s not that hard to pass for at least half.

So I’ve been working for hours every single week and I just joined the Laie Halau which is run by the Hawaiian Culture Expert and consultant for the Polynesian Cultural Center and I am going to learn the trueblue kahiko hula (what’s left of it, anyway, since the art was nearly lost. Thank God for King Kalakaua) and it is so so soo amazing. I mean, the tourists get to see dances like this.

And the second dance in that video is really really beautiful and more traditional. In fact besides He Mele No Lilo and Hawaiian Santa Clause (yes, google that, you will not regret it) it is my favorite hula.

And this, is the type of hula I am learning.

And so I’m also adding a video for you that is another kahiko hula (kahiko means old so think of it as ancient hula) And it’s a really, really good one. Some of the ways to know which is an old hula and which is new is that for kahiko YOU DO NOT EVER EVER SMILE. So if they are smiling during the dance, it’s hula auana! New hula! There you go. Actually that is the one best way to tell.

Also part of the reason I’m being clear about this is that Hawaiians and locals here get really, really passionate about cultural practices and especially DANCING. They no like the modern stuff for certain things.

Also if you see someone dressed like this, any of these. IT IS NOT HAWAIIAN RUN AWAY SCREAMING

Or stay and enjoy the show. Your choice.

Anyways so in the middle of the loca that is my life, these are the dances I have to learn. Also I will be learning the haka. Helpful tip to the Maoris the haka is a prayer to summon their ancestors spirits, that’s why the women shake their hands is to represent the presence of the ancestors. It’s deeply spiritual. So don’t fake it in front of a Maori or you will get beat. Polynesians are pretty good about not being shy to tell you if you just did wrong, especially about their culture. They prefer to teach you rather than letting you run around like a profane headless chicken.

My my my. I just used the phrase “profane headless chicken”, I should be paid.



And of course, hula. In two styles.

The blue is the link because I’m lazy.

Also my dance class today we learned a SAsa. If you don’t emphasize the SAW part at the beginning then you are saying a spanking. You don’t want to say you learned a spanking dance, okay? Let’s keep it appropriate today. It is a Samoan slap dance and my gosh, when I get a video of that dance it is the most fun dance I have ever done. You sit down on the floor and it’s all clapping and bouncing your knees up and down to drumbeats and it gets intense when you have a big group. It is SO MUCH FUN.

If I ever like, have to come to somebody’s school and present about something awesome I can do, I’m teaching them a sasa.


What business do we have with that extreme disrespect of their customs? Like I said, we should look at coming to Hawai’i as a privilege because this is NOT OURS. And you should treat other people’s possessions with even more respect and care than your own. It is such a violation of a person when you take something from them that they treasure and proceed to tear it apart right in front of their eyes.


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